A year go I began this blog with every intention of sharing my thoughts on my real life experiences in longterm recovery. However my intentions and my follow through can be very different things. It’s very easy for me generate reasons to procrastinate: daily life is busy, I’m not sure there is really the audience that others for my blather and it’s just plain scary to share personal thoughts. However the reality is that it this point in my life I have lost touch with being mindful and living a truly intention life and change is a must.
Many people have asked why hike the Appalachian Trail? I’m 52, have had a shoulder replacement and a couple of spinal injuries. Am I being sensible? Maybe not but I have a drive. A very strong drive to work on making a journey back to living an intentional life. To integrating mindfulness back into who I am as a person, as I was in the very beginning of my recovery. For a long time now I have been living my life without being actively present. Seeking meaning in trivial aspects of life and being left wanting more….but more of what exactly? That is the million dollar question and what I have determined is that what I’m seeking is meaning. This beccame glaring obvious when at my mothers bedside having the honor of helping her ease out of this life. The least trival thing I have done in my lifetime. While there is much meaning from my family I need more from the rest of my life and it is my responsibly to find it.
Mindfullness is the practice of focussing on the present moment and accepting it without any judgement. Harder than it sounds! Do I accept assignments and quit at the halfway point? Go to the gym and decide enough is enough? Am I going head home because I have blisters, its raining and I’m cold or hike on to achieve my 2190 mile goal? Will I give it my all? Focusing my attention on my intentional decisions will make an eye opening experience and hopefully bring me back to where I need to be.
Hiking is obviously great physically but also mentally. Being in nature is where I began my mindfulness practice, watering horses at Wonderland farm. Using that opportunity to tune into both my own experience and the world around me. Being on the AT will give me a chance to do that in a much larger way. Drawing much closer to the natural world. So much closer….and probably longing for a shower like never before!